The Fig Tree Dilemma: Why Not Choosing Is Costing You Everything

The goal is abundance, isn’t it?

To be able to have everything, do everything, be everywhere!

But what if aiming for abundance is the very thing that will ensure you..

… have nothing, do nothing, and waste your life in the bleak wasteland of indecision.

Abundance is not the goal. 

Abundance is the cornucopia of life, giving us infinite options.

Abundance is there to inspire us, to light our path - but not to be chased after.

The very nature of abundance is that it is unobtainable. It is infinite. There is no end to possibilities.

Abundance is NOT the opposite of scarcity - enough is!

And the deep satiation and joy of Enough can only be experienced by making a choice and committing to that.

Choosing means closing the door to a million other possibilities.

Choosing means grieving all the things you will never do, the experiences you will never have, the lives you will never live.

And that is freedom.

In this video, I share a beautiful poem, Sylvia Plath’s "The Fig Tree", that captures this perfectly and expands on the urgency of making choices if you truly want to live your life to the full. 

👉 Go here to watch the video 

“I saw my life branching out before me like the green fig tree in the story. From the tip of every branch, like a fat purple fig, a wonderful future beckoned and winked. One fig was a husband and a happy home and children, and another fig was a famous poet and another fig was a brilliant professor, and another fig was Ee Gee, the amazing editor, and another fig was Europe and Africa and South America, and another fig was Constantin and Socrates and Attila and a pack of other lovers with queer names and offbeat professions, and another fig was an Olympic lady crew champion, and beyond and above these figs were many more figs I couldn’t quite make out. I saw myself sitting in the crotch of this fig tree, starving to death, just because I couldn’t make up my mind which of the figs I would choose. I wanted each and every one of them, but choosing one meant losing all the rest, and, as I sat there, unable to decide, the figs began to wrinkle and go black, and, one by one, they plopped to the ground at my feet.” 

The Paradox of Choice

Choosing one means not choosing the others.

This is the real dilemma of a full and wealthy life

We live in a world where we are constantly told:

“You can have it all.”

But the truth is far more nuanced.

You can have many things over a lifetime.

But you cannot have everything at once.

And that’s where the real work begins.

Because the challenge is not a lack of opportunity.

It’s the courage to choose.

Not choosing costs you more than you think

One of the biggest traps I see, especially in high-achieving women, is this:

We try to keep all our options open.

We don’t want to close doors.

We don’t want to make the “wrong” decision.

We don’t want to lose any version of what life could be.

So we hover.

In indecision.

In “maybe.”

In “not yet.”

In “I’ll figure it out later.

In “if I just work faster and harder.”

But Indecision is not neutral.

It has a cost.

Because when you don’t choose, your:

• Money gets scattered into things that don’t deeply matter.
• Time gets filled with obligation rather than intention.
• Energy gets drained by distraction and low-level noise.

While you hum and haw over the ‘big choices”, you squander your precious life on low-value activities.

Spending your time, your money, your energy on things that don’t truly light you up.

Saying yes to things that don’t align with your deepest desire.

Drifting instead of directing.

The light of your being dims.

Your life becomes bland and unfulfilling.

Choosing Means Grieving

Here’s the part most people don’t talk about.

Choosing one life means grieving the others.

And that feels uncomfortable AF.

Because it means saying:

No to some of your dreams.

No to infinite exciting versions of yourself.

No to so many enticing paths.

But this isn’t loss in the way we often think.

It is only by being prepared to let go and feel this loss that we can ever feel the freedom and liberation of truly committing.

This is how we get to live the vast and wealthy life that is meant for each of us. 

Because you cannot delight in the juicy sweetness of a fig if you’re trying to hold ten others in your hands at the same time.

Your money follows your choices

When you choose a direction for your life…

👉 Your decisions become easier.

👉 Your spending becomes clearer.
👉 Your investing becomes more intentional.
👉 Your time starts aligning with what matters.

Because instead of asking:

“What should I do?”

You start asking:

“Does this support the life I’ve chosen?”

And that question changes everything.

The illusion of “the perfect choice.”

Another reason we hesitate is because we’re looking for certainty.

We want to know:

Is this the right choice?

Is this the best path?

What if I regret it?

But there is no perfect fig.

There is only the fig you choose, and then fully enjoy.

It’s not about right or wrong.

It’s about commitment.

Once you choose, you create meaning through how you show up.

The freedom that comes from deciding

Ironically, the moment you choose, life becomes simpler.

Not smaller.

Simpler.

Because:

• You stop overthinking every decision
• You stop second-guessing every move
• You stop scattering your resources

And instead, you begin to build something.

You go deeper.

You experience more.

You create momentum.

And the beautiful part:

When you fully live one season, one path, one “fig”…

You create the capacity to experience many others.

Committing to one opens the floodgates of more.

This is the power of letting this one thing be enough!

A question to sit with

As we move through seasons, whether it’s the freshness of spring or the grounding of autumn, it’s a powerful time to reflect.

Is there a “fig” beckoning you right now?

A version of life that wants your attention?

And if so…

What are the other figs you need to let go of?

Not because they don’t matter.

But because this one does.

The life you get to live is the one you choose

The real tragedy isn’t choosing “wrong.”

It’s not choosing at all.

Because that’s how beautiful possibilities quietly slip away.

Not with a bang.

But with a soft, unnoticed, rotting plop.

So choose.

Choose imperfectly.
Choose bravely.
Choose without needing guarantees.

And then…

Live it fully.

With love,
Ann x

P.S. If you’re feeling stuck in “maybe land”, unsure where your money, time, and energy should go, this is exactly the kind of conversation we have inside the Wealth Builders Club. 

It’s where we get clear on what you truly want, and how to align your money, time, and choices with the life you’re here to live.